Wednesday, July 26, 2017


Hi there, it's me again, as if people care.

so, for the past 3 weeks or so, I'm just not feeling myself at all. I've not been productive, not been doing anything that makes me happy and instead I'm just sitting in my room after school and just trying not to do anything stupid. I just feel that pure sadness lingers around me like an invisible mist. The worst part of everything is that I feel sad for the smallest things and I tend to hate myself. I can't just open up myself to people that barely cares about how I'm gonna feel about things. It's just so frustrating that I have to keep everything inside and just be this sad person. I'm not sad because I have problems with people or anything, its just a phase where I feel like a solid rock. On the outside, I might look happy and shit but then it in the inside, I'm just feeling a lil lonely.

Currently in my last semester before finishing my pre-u, I'm just not feeling anything. I have piles of work that I have to do and submit a month from now and I'm not even started. Notes? Homeworks? I wish I did something in class. I don't sleep in class and I can't focus for more than 30 minutes. I just feel very distracted because I'm always thinking about when I'm gonna actually do my work. Call me lazy and a person that procrastinates but I can only get things done if I have a really short time limit. For example , if I have an essay due the very next day, I can only do it 3 hours before I sleep. I just don't know why I'm doing this and it bothers to a certain level where I definitely have a conversation with myself and I'll be like 'what am I even doing with my life?, I should be productive and also I
have to eat something' and that's it for now because

I have tons of work that's due tomorrow and I'm hungry so bye.